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No! Sleep! Til Brooklynn!

That’s right, it’s time for another round of Bad Baby Names, this one lead off by Brooklynn. Tip: If you’re going to name your kid after a New York City borough, at least spell it properly. Actually, don’t listen to me. Misspell it. That way I can make fun of the next person to name their kid Quyynz.

I don’t fully understand this trend of taking a perfectly good name like Ethan and fucking with it by throwing more letters at it. Tip the second: More letters does not make for a better name. Case in point: Zethan. It sounds like the name of a planet from Amazing Stories. Another case in point: Kaizehya.

No, seriously, what the fuck is wrong with parents? Kaizehya? Are you kidding me?

Of course, you can throw letters at names to tart them up, but it takes a real professional to use punctuation. And the king and queen of Tart have to be the proud parents of little Drayecen-Rylee’Joe.