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This week’s first Bad Baby Name hearkens back to the very first Bad Baby Name post here, where Dicetin was the co-loser. This week we have little Dycein. You can use them both in a sentence! “Did you put the Dycein the Dicetin?”

Breezy is a name you give your kid when you want to sign them up for Abbott & Costello routines. “What’s the weather like, Breezy?” “Yes it is.” “Yes it is what?” “It’s Breezy.” “I know that, I was asking what the weather’s like!”

Kievyn is just a poorly chosen name. The rationale parents always give for giving their kids stupid misspellings of common names is so their child will have a unique name. Well guess what, when teacher’s yelling at “Kevin” your precious unique gem is going to respond too. That’s the sign of a common name. The misspelling just makes you look stupid.

Reef can go play with Ocean Reef Butts.

I understand liking a name. I don’t understand liking a name so much you use it twice. Clearly Jushin Jack-Jack’s parents really like the name Jack.

But our co-winners today take the cake. When you have twins, one a boy and one a girl, it’s not unusual to give them similar names. Samuel and Samantha, for example. You don’t give them the same name, though. Unfortunately that’s what one set of parents did, they named their twins Rustyn and Rustynn. Who’s the boy? Who’s the girl? Who’s the idiot (hint: there are two and they’re older than one year old)?

Seriously, Rustyn and Rustynn? Rustyn by itself is a stupid name. It’s something cars do when they’re out in the rain. But to double it up and name your twins Rustyn and Rustynn? Is one pronounced “rustin” (like a tin can) and the other “rustine” (like a tine on a fork)? Or “rusteen”? Are the parents going to yell out “RUSTYN WITH ONE N GET OVER HERE”?