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Funny symbols that don’t belong in names is the theme of today’s Bad Baby Names post. Quickly, let’s get names that don’t fit the theme out of the way: Franther and Zhenson. Franther is kind of weird, Zhenson is some stupid bastardization of Jenson, I presume. Both bad.

Now on to names that have symbols that belong in names but, well, end up making the name pretty bad. Our first example is Prince-Charles. Prince would be a good name for a dog, a not so good name for a boy. Charles is a perfectly good name. Prince Charles is a good name if you’re actually a prince. Otherwise it’s a bad name. Prince-Charles is just bad on every possible level.

Getting progressively worse is Laæakea-David. Now don’t get me wrong, æ is a perfectly acceptable grapheme. It’s a character in many different languages around the world. In this context, however, Laæakea is… I can’t really tell. I don’t know what language that is supposed to be. Tarted-up Hawaiian? And to hyphenate it with David is crazy.

And now we come to the major theme of today’s post: the lowly apostrophe. I’m not talking about the `okina, which is a character in the Hawaiian alphabet. I’m talking about the apostrophe, whose use is primarily for contractions and possessives. Take one of today’s bad baby names, for example: Jay’n. What’s the apostrophe for? I think Jay’n is actually a contraction for Jaymyparentsarestupidn.

But taking the prize today is a set of twins. Their first names were not particularly note-worthy, but their middle names, hoo boy. Q’ashaani-Ja’de and Q’ayah-Se’dalle. That’s all kinds of bad right there.