It’s been a while since our last post, but trust me, the wait is worth it. I’ve been sitting on the first five Bad Baby Names for a few weeks in hopes that more would come join them. Today’s baby name column in the Trib supplied worthy contenders, so it’s our lucky day!
Rysha was one of the ones I was sitting on for a while. It’s bad. Equally bad is Ryland Race. And Tenielle. I think they were going for Tennille.
One little boy got one hell of a good middle name. His name is William Tribble Wood. Tribble!
Getting to this week’s list (you’ll notice I haven’t sprung the fifth name on you yet, that comes at the end), I knew it was going to be a good one from the very first name in the column: Jezzika. That’s horrible.
Equally horrible is Cashus. I think they were going for Cassius but spelled it phonetically. They tried… but failed.
Xarahlyn’s parents didn’t even try. They failed right from the start.
This week’s co-winners are Destinee (that’s the one I was sitting on) and Destany`sue. I can feel you shuddering in horror from here.
#1 by Chad on 28 September 2009 - 9:20 am
I dunno, Rysha, Ryland Race, and Tenielle aren’t so bad really. Yes, they’re made-up names, but at least they’re … sensible somehow? Like, there are no quantifiable, objective *errors* in them. If I pronounce “Tenielle” in two syllables, I even almost like it.
At least, I don’t think those first ones are in the same league as the rest. The rest are sporting deliberate misspellings of valid names, horrific letter swapping and insertion, or gratuitous punctuation, for starters. They’re objectively criminal, as opposed to merely borderline precious, say.
#2 by Brad on 28 September 2009 - 10:16 am
Yeah, the first batch isn’t as bad as it could be, which is why I was sitting on them for so long. They weren’t bad enough to warrant their own post.
#3 by Mira on 05 October 2009 - 8:33 pm
Once there was a kid at my school with the last name Heine. Pronounced “HI-NEE,” as in your butt. Yes.
#4 by Honest John on 08 October 2009 - 7:28 am
@Mira, Heinrich Heine was a famous German poet of the 19th century, and it is pronounced in German “HIGHN-uh.”